09 September 2010

Improvement, yes. Perfection, no.

I am feeling a little behind tonight, but that's due in part to me getting over a cold.  I'm caught up with homework and studying, or I will be tonight once I get done posting this and open the books back up.  I still find I have the same reactions in classes, all of which are in lecture halls this semester.  The Livescribe smartpen is helping a great deal, although I'm still tweaking my note taking method.  My math classes are just beginning to get past the introductory sections, so more on that later.  It's helping, I just don't have many specifics to write about yet.

I'm finding that living so close makes the world a much calmer place; I have my small PTSD moments during the day, but getting home at 1400 versus getting home at 2330 makes a huge difference.  I feel like I'm spending a lot of time in my apartment, but again with getting over a cold, I don't want to sit on the quiet floor of a library coughing and sneezing.  Misery loves company, but it doesn't work the other way around.

I am struggling, a little (okay, a lot) with social life-- I am currently without a romantic partner.  This has its good points (I can concentrate on school), and its bad points (I don't have a romantic partner).  I'm finding it difficult to decide where I fit on the social scale; I am (sometimes much) older than 98% of my academic peers.  I am also an oddity as a fortysomething because most people my age are not full time students.  I think the students I know are more accepting of me being older than the 40's crowd is with me being a student.  My university has a reputation as a party school (to put it mildly), so the 40's crowd tends to jump to the conclusion that since I'm back in school, I'm doing beer bongs and playing flip cup every night.

It's still a social catch-22.  If you're a career woman in your 40's, do you want to tell your friends and co-workers that you're dating a student?  (That answer is apparently no; please refer to above notification that I'm single again.)  If you're a college student in your 20's, do you want to tell your friends and your Mom and Dad that you're dating a guy over 40?   That's another consistent no.

Once again, there doesn't seem to be a manual for this stuff.

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