14 July 2010

Summer and social life

I'm feeling a bit down-- I haven't written much (any) about relationships here because, well, I haven't really had to.  One just ended, and while there's mutual interest in keeping things friendly, it's just not the same.
A member of the opposite sex that's just a friend is like having an ATM card and only $19.00 in your bank account.  --Alonzo Boden
I've been feeling a bit down lately.  The initial rush of getting all of my paperwork done and getting the fallout from spring semester is over.  Now, I have work and getting ready to move on the schedule for the rest of the summer.  I'd like to be out doing things downtown, on campus, in the park, etc, but I feel really isolated living as far away from campus (and downtown) as I do.  Most of the people I know that are still around campus for the summer live on campus, where it's easy to do social stuff-- everyone else is either a short walk or short bike ride away.  To get downtown or to campus, I either have to drive or take the bus.  If I drive, I also have to find and pay for a place to park, and I can't drink because I have to drive home.  If I take the bus, I have to make sure I don't stay anywhere too late, because the bus only runs so late (and I honestly don't like taking the bus late at night anyway).

In a larger sense, I'm feeling socially isolated because I'm in a somewhat unique social situation.

When I tell people my age that I'm a full time student it feels like a wall goes up-- honestly, the look on some people's faces makes me think someone just passed gas.  I live in a college town, so people have perceptions of what being in college is like.  They see the drunk kids out at night, they read in the paper that binge drinking is an issue, they remember what they did in college.  Then they get that looks that says "Oh.", and I infer from that that think they've grown up and are past that, and somehow they think I'm trying to live my own chapter of Old School.  They're looking for stability, and I'm looking for the next sale on macaroni and cheese so I can afford books for next semester.

Then, there's my fellow students (and co-workers, all of whom are also students).  I'm sure that for some of them, my appearance at a house party would be something similar to someone's Dad showing up to have a beer.  I am, in fact, old enough to be the parent of some of my classmates.  While I've never had any problem interacting with anyone in classes, it's another story altogether to say "hey, wanna get a cup of coffee?" to someone who is half your age.

I think once classes start again, and I'm closer to campus where many of my friends are, my outlook on things will improve a little.  Being in a college town, even a decent sized one, things are a little quieter during the summer.  I'll likely be busy enough that I won't have time for romance anyway.  Until then, I feel a little down. 

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